Dime Bar Cheesecake (TM)

The birthday celebrations continue unabated with a tea party tomorrow, just like the queen. Unfortunately (given that most people will be driving) this really will be a tea party, and not an excuse to do a spot of mid-afternoon tippling. But there you go - you can't have everything.

In true "afternoon tea at the Savoy" style, we should get a bit of ivory tinkling from my friend Roland. However, all this fingerwork necessarily requires fuelling, so I have promised to make him my World Famous Dime Bar Cheesecake(TM).

Recipe:

• Digestive biscuits - squash to crumbs, and glue back together with real butter
• Tin of condensed milk - if you've got 4 hours to spare, boil the whole tin. If not, boil the contents for a couple of mins with MORE BUTTER until it looks golden and tasty
• The white bit - mascapone / curd cheese / philadelphia / whatever opaque cheesiness you prefer. Possibly with some sugar and lime juice to zip it up a bit.
• Dime bars - crush them with a hammer. Or by banging them on the counter. Or stomp on them.
• Assemble all the above in a logical order
• Lick fingers
• Er...
• That's it!